Wednesday, August 29, 2012
S.O.S. Grab a life vest, I'm sinking this parenting ship!
Today I had one of those days, where you just sit and want to cry... actually, I did... ALOT.
I really really really really love my son.
I get really really really really frustrated with my son.
He just can't sit still... ever. I'm exhausted just watching him jump off of things. I tell him 1,000 times per day "don't jump off of furniture" or "be gentle with your sister" or "calm down" or "RELAX!!!!"... which I usually say in my most calm and relaxed voice :)
He has an incredibly hard time listening. I reward for good behavior, I threaten, I punish, I time-out, I take things away for bad behavior... he still doesn't get it.
Warrick starts preschool in 6 days and I'm already anticipating a call from his teacher saying "maybe he should get checked for ADHD". He's that energetic... all.the.time. I'm always trying to play board games, puzzles, or color with him and he's not having it. He wants to use the board game as a frisbee, see if the disposal can shred the puzzle, and color on the walls.
Tonight, I was praying about this and asking for clarity on how to handle Warrick better. Later on, I read an amazing article. It was 20 points to know about raising boys. There were 3 that hit home the most for me that I really needed to hear. So I copied them:
*Boys Don't Stop Moving:
"From the moment they come bouncing into your bed at 5:30 in the morning until they pass out at bedtime, boys go. Sometimes it seems like they have only two speeds -- fast and faster."
*Roughhousing Is Innate:
"Boys are physical. There's the jumping off furniture, the rolling on each other, the "hug" that turns into a full-body running tackle. Play fighting and roughhousing is surprisingly hard-wired into many boys. It's often how they connect and express affection. Don't worry- it's normal and experts say it's healthy. This kind of physical interaction can foster positive relationships, boost the body's feel-good chemicals and promote intelligence -- even if it means stuff around the house is going to get broken."
*You'll Learn Not to Compare Your Son to Girls:
"Watch a girl the same age as your nonstop ball of energy sit quietly and use glitter glue for 45 minutes and you may want to cry. Girls often reach milestones earlier and excel at many essential school skills like reading -- and, err, sitting still."
I've always known these to be true, it's common sense really. But I needed to hear it from someone I don't know. I am no longer diagnosing Warrick with ADHD, but with BOY! And until he "grows out" of his crazy energy... I will choose to enjoy the ride and drink lots and lots of coffee so I can keep up.
One day I will be a good parent... today wasn't that day. Tomorrow will be better, and the next day hopefully better than that. I'm a work in progress. My relationship with my son is a continual reminder that I can do NOTHING without God. I am so thankful to serve a God who is CONSTANTLY patient with me and I strive to be more like Him everyday.
Thanks for reading!
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You are a good parent today and everyday because you love your children and do everything you can for them :)
ReplyDeleteI felt like this a lot right before Dani started preschool. Preschool was an amazing thing for her and for us. She learned to channel a lot of her energy into learning activities that I struggled to get her to do at home.
I still get overwhelmed sometimes but it is better now, I hope you and Warrick both have a great preschool experience.
As a mother of 3 boys, I completely understand. I am happy to say though that our oldest, JR, made it through all day kindergarten last year with only one note sent home for behavior. I had worried and worried about him going to school and having to sit still. So instead of worrying I began to pray, Lord give him a teacher that understand him and can be patient with him and work with him. And God gave him the most amazing teacher. So grateful that God knows exactly what my son needs and is able to supply him with that. Little boys are full of crazy energy all of the time, while all 3 of mine are very different, that is one thing that is very much in the same in all of them. Continue being patient, I know it is hard, and teaching him the right things, eventually he will get it, he will think before he does, and you will smile to yourself and feel a bit of relief :)
ReplyDeleteI'll say prayers for you as I say prayers for me! I think my girls lands slightly in the "boy" spectrum of things. :-) I read something the other day that REALLY put things into perspective for me... (this is a paraphrase)... God knew about this moment of frustration before you yourself were even born. He knew exactly how your child would drive you crazy and challenge you, and He gave you this child anyways because he knew you were the perfect parent for him/her. Let's say thankful prayers that Warrick and Emmy aren't in the same class! See, God already had his hand in it because I think the two of them could have driven a teacher to quit! :-) But, in all seriousness, God has amazing things planned for all that energy!
ReplyDeletewell after spending lots of time with preschoolers and kindergarten students the past week I can tell you that he sounds like a typical 3 year old boy:)
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